Magiczored!

Today was good fun. Woke up at 12. Sister was here. Chatted with the family. Played tennis on my Xbox. Invited people over for cards. Cleaned up the house. Helped my dad make soup. Built a deck with no win condition. Three kids arrived. My new deck won. Played another crappy deck and managed to win again via politics. I got everyone else to kill each other while I convinced them I wasn't a threat, as always, staved off death, then when will's life was 5 and brian's was 3, I lightning bolted three times for the win. It was totally unexpected and I would say undeserved, except that the deck is designed to sit around and do nothing but wait for others to kill each other. The two games combined lasted two hours and they were both long but silly, so people had fun. Neal arrived finally at 830 and we played some more. Three children left at 930 then Neal, Alex and I three-wayed it until now and I would say it was fun for everyone. I feel happy that everyone could leave with a feeling of joy after having a good night of fun. I just read that Sarah is selling all her Xbox stuff and I don't know why and it saddens me. I realized I haven't written since Xmas.
On that day, stuff was good. The night before we chilled at the sista's house and had delicious food and I creamed her at chess. On the day of merriment, gifts were given and such. I felt undergifted in my stocking full of useless junk I would never enjoy, until suddenly I was handed a present to open that turned itself into an Xbox upon opening. Then I got a controller and all kinds of stuff and my sister got me Halo2! Except she had to make a big deal about it and not let me open it until I had no more presents, and I was very confident it was Halo2 before I opened it. Anyway, the Xbox came with a combo of football 2005 and top spin, and Top Spin is very fun. You create a tennis player, design her body and face and looks and DNA, then train her, earn money from challenges and tournaments, train her more, and eventually hope to become ranked first in the world. You start at ranking 100 and I'm down to 26, so I'm fairly good, but at all the major tournaments I've had to face women ranked 1-4 until now, so I couldn't beat them. With a higher ranking now I should get better seeding and not face them until the semi's at least. Oh yes, you can play as male characters, but I prefer to create female characters, because designing the ultimate hot female is fun and then I get to watch her play tennis. As Anna Kournakova's success as a model has indicated, watching female tennis players to their thing is fun. Plus, I get to hear them yell as they serve and such. I think I've managed to take a totally non-sexual game like tennis and turn it as sexually based as possible. Excellent. Anyways, it's 3am and I must be lonely, as the song goes. The job search appears to be a lost cause and I'm not getting as much grief about it as I expected though any day somebody could explode on me. Oh, I was just sent, http://www.wizards.com/default.asp?x=mtgcom/daily/aa156. And now I'm talking to Blair and Neal. Ninjas will be the ultimate next set. Perhaps I will go to benG's on new year's eve this friday to chill with many other champs. I haven't seen them in a while. And I should make it a point to see fricano. I have no more to say to you. I can't believe people still check in on this. I expect when I return to alfred I will suddenly get another 10 hits. OOO! And gagne will be back next year and we'll play magic for several days straight! Alex tore apart all his decks and began life anew, thus life is fun and new again. His zubera deck is not only fun, but it is good, very synergestic, and did I say good? Why are you still reading? Can't you see I've stopped trying to entertain you after the first few sentences of this blog? Oh yeah, I was going to say, my half sister came over here last night at two in the morning down from rochester. It was freaking horrible driving conditions out there too--almost impossible to even see the road, and yet she somehow made it the hour drive down here. She was having a very bad day and wanted to talk to my dad but he was out plowing walmart because he has a strange obsession with finding totally wacked out jobs and being busy with them all the time. So I was up playing Top spin and I tried to entertain her and the first thing she asked for was some alcoholic drink, and all I could find was some scotch bottle left over from christmas. I talked with her for a while but didn't know what to say to someone who was having a horrible day and who I rarely talk to, but I did what I could. Eventually, things escalated, she broke into tears, my dad showed up, she became hysterical and apparently had far too much scotch to drink, then decided to drive home. She had a family thing to go to the next day and she needed to drive her kids there the next day thus she felt very pressured to get home and get rest. I am, however, expressing what she said in a hysterical, drunk, and hyperemotional fashion, in normal words. I'd never heard her swear before and that night she was swearing constantly. She tried to drive away and my dad had to physically restrain her from driving drunk, and she got very angry very fast and she was yelling at the top of her lungs at 330am words of hate. It was a learning experience if nothing else, and I learned I do have compassion for those I thought I didn't care about, just because they're people, and some other things. This isn't entertaining me to write about anything right now, so I will end. Peace out, merry gangstas.

Shopping and Such

Today was much fun. Alex picked myself up at nine, then Neal up and we went began our day. First it was the bank, then the den for an hour, then the mall for many hours of wandering around jubilantly and little tokyo dining. It was 40 degrees and rained for a couple hours until the roads were ice free. I got my shopping done. We ran into a bunch of people throughout our journey. First it was Kyle and Tim Spayd and Cailin at the mall. Next we were driving from the mall to Wegmans and Neal said "that looks like Gagne's car. Pull up and see," and sure enough it was gagne and his parents, at an intersection in the middle of no where. We had thought he was in Maine but he had returned and was now on his way to Colorado and we had bumped into him in the hour or so time frame he was present in Canandaigua. We chatted during the stoplight then did wegmans and walmart and ran into many other people like Will Sacco in those stores to the point where it was weird. We wasted a lottt of time throughout the day but it was much fun. We got to Alex's house about five and I had no car so i was stranded there. I felt really tired so i took a nap for 10 minutes and then we played magic with will and his friend, who happens to be really talkative and annoying, but i put up with it. Anyway, the magic games involved too many people and were slow so they sucked at first, but we had some good ones later on. Eventually it got too competitive and alex felt disrespected when he was losing and also his sisters pissed him off a lot. People went home about 12 and we watched some family guy and dr. adventure and some crap show and I played alex in chess. Alex took the game personally, and i destroyed him, but it took forever with him just avoiding certain defeat and he wouldn't forfeit, and neal was like "why'd you do that! you could have done this!" and that got him pissed. Neal and I argued, I saying that what neal was talking about wasn't going to defeat me because i had options, and neal saying it was, when the pieces were long since moved, so neither of us could prove the other wrong, and alex was annoyed. When I won, alex just said, "you guys gotta go" and kicked us out fairly quickly. In the car I brought up his anger and he explained why he was pissed and we apologized and I hope he isn't pissed for long. He seemed more pissed at his sisters, but we still felt bad. Anyways, Neal and I are having a very interesting conversation about multiple subjects right now and I am signing out, wishing you a merry christmas on a merry christmas eve! May the Christmas spirit find your home and bring you many great material goods.

Why Neal is Awesome

I'm going to take it from the top. So first of all, I decided yesterday would be a fun time to play around with my control panel and set up a password. It also happened that I have no keyboard. I left that thing at Alfred, apparently. I'm typing right now because I stole the old grimy keyboard from my dad's old grimy computer, which is broken anyways. But yesterday I was without keyboard and had to type via the on-screen keyboard under accessories. My mind is straying, but the point was supposed to be that I screwed myself over when I got to the sign on screen and couldn't type in a password, and thus had to steal this keyboard. To begin, after I woke up at 2pm(friday) and left by 5pm and got a hair(most of them) cut, I went home, called Neal, went to the Den, and watched kids playing Magic. It's still the same group of people at the Den, which is good, because they're all pretty cool. Greg and Tom McKinney were being especially hilarious, but the group in general is funny. We played some and watched some from 7-9 then left for Neal's. I talked with Sam for a bit and turns out he and his friend had hosted a LAN party just last week, Friday, with Halo2 and prizes. They got sponsored by some companies, thus the free prizes, and had over 80 people there. Bummer I didn't know about it. I played Magic and talked with neal until about 130 then left home. I'd said I would be home at 12 at the latest and I felt kinda guilty being later, but I consoled myself by saying that my dad's asleep anyways and things of that nature. So after that, I pointlessly played Warcraft III for a couple hours from 2-5am until I started to get tired.
Today, my dad woke me up at 10am and I was super-tired. I really didn't want to get up and he started yelling and saying all the things he had already accomplished that day, and 10am wasn't asking much for me to be up, and why didn't I go to bed sooner, asked, "you do get up for classes,-don't you?" yada yada yada. So I got up and zombied around for half and hour, then we left to find a tree. The second place we went to had a decent tree, and my dad paid the 25$ for the thing. I drove back and was super tired still so I convinced my dad that I could take a nap until I picked up Neal to go to Aunt Sue's party. My nap ran an hour long, and I had a spiffy dream, until I drove my dad to get ice for the party and dropped him off. Then I went to Neal's and woke him up. He went to bed at 9am, so he was running on 5 hours of sleep, but he was far less tired upon waking than I had been. After his gf called and I spent another 45 minutes there, we left for my aunt's party.
This party is an annual event, where relatives on my mom's side get together with friends and neighbors and eat and talk. Usually, this is something that I don't look forward to at all: no one is there that is my age because I'm in between generations. The youngest is Delacey and she's 11, and the next youngest is like 23 or 24. So there's six years difference either way, and then stack on the fact that adults are always trying to make conversation with me, and you have a bad time waiting to happen. Adults always ask the same questions, "how's college. do you like it. what's your major. glad you had break?" It's incredibly repetitive. Everybody, everybody, asks those questions to the point where I respond with memorized answers with a monotone, and that effort that I make to seem interested in their question gets washed away. This year I was just hoping to survive it again. Luckily for me, I found this great way to have fun in bad situations; it's called: invite Neal. I feel like I'm advertising for Neal now (buy stocks! rent Neal for a day!). Seriously, he makes any occasion fun, and I don't know exactly how he does it. We avoided adults for a large majority of the time, played darts, went sledding with Delacey and her friends, threw snow at them and walked on the pond. Delacey is an obsessively violent child who desires to beat up on those who are older and bigger, and Neal and I rose to the challenge by dunking her head in the snow, rolling her down the hill, burrying her in snow, et cetera. We pretty much got followed around by my cousin Delacey and her friends for a couple hours, we played some Battleship, watched Bambi, and had a great time. Finally, just as we were leaving, Neal somehow got asked to juggle and he managed to get everyone entertained and laughing just before we left. He has mad entertainment skills and I'm glad I know him. He's just plain so awesome that being around him makes things fun. So we came back to my farm at about 7 and played magic and he taught me gin, and we played some go fish and rummy. We went online and he showed me some pictures of those he knows in vermont at the facebook.com. Finally, at 1am I came up with the bright idea that we should go and sit in gagne's driveway, so when he arrives home we'll be there waiting there and he'll be like "what the..." and it would be funny. But his mom, when I had called his house, said he wouldn't be home until two. So we went to go find something to do and I pulled out my seventh grade yearbook. Oh my gosh that was fun.
I can remember things I was thinking at that age, especially in terms of how I would look back on middle school years from then, and that is exactly what was happening. Glimpsing at the past is awesome. We marvelled over how different/funny everyone looked back then, and read all the hilarious comments in my yearbook. Turns out I had hung out with some people I didn't even remember existed. I was like, "oh yeah! I used to hang out with that kid in such and such class." People praised me highly and I was loved by all! Then we moved on to identifying which girls we thought were hot back then and which ones are hot now. We have almost the same taste in women so we agreed on all but two girls. I remember girls used to be so freakin' hot back in seventh grade. We recalled teachers we had and things that we remembered about them. It was awesome. Then I busted out my sixth grade yearbook. It was dramatic how much of a difference there was. In grade six, there are about 3 hot girls in the class, and in seventh there are about 40. I'm thinking that looks don't play all the role in deciding who's hot and who's not, but it has more to do with your perception of them. People I had a crush on seemed like they were glowing in their pictures, when really they were just alright. Anyway, it was quite fun. Back in sixth grade I had gone through with Chris Otto and circled all the girls we thought were hot and I stay firm to what I thought back then. Then we had underlined people we thought were cool apparently, because Neal's name was underlined. I was like, "wtf? I didn't even know you back then!" Then we found out we had been in the same math class in seventh grade, and it was interesting finding out all these friends neal once had or hung out with. And I found gagne's picture in the seventh grade soccer picture; he had been in all my classes and clarinet lessons, and math classes and still I hadn't noticed him. It's crazy how later you can look back and be like, "wow, I didn't know you at all. I just ignored you-I never thought you would wind up being my friend." It was really interesting. I don't know why I type so much. It just feels like I'm telling all the things that were important to me today to someone. When I say the words in my head it's like I'm talking out loud and they want to hear everything I say. In reality, no more than 2 people will ever read this, and more than likely, they will have given up reading by now just because I'm blabbing on about nonsense. Words lose all their flavor when somebody isn't there to emphasize them and gesture with their hands, and hear their excitement and tone of voice. Telling someone first person makes stories far more interesting than reading it on paper. I suppose that's why my writing is worded how I talk. I talk in my head as if I'm telling someone the story and I type what I say. It's supposed to make reading the events more lifelike and energetic, but it's probably just confusing to follow. Anyway, finally we drove down to gagne's driveway and sat there for a while with my lights on facing the house. We got there at 220 and numerous lights were on in the gagne household. 3 cars were there so we assumed he was already inside and unpacked, but we feared the gagne mother and father too much to knock on the door at this hour. So we sat there for 15 minutes and flashed my brights a few times, and the air in the car was humorous. Hanging out with Neal is a blast. Nobody ended up peering through the blinds at us, but on the other hand, nobody came out with a shotgun or called the cops, so we eventually left. Thus concludes my last two days. Each day I live and I hang out with neal is a good day. So neal, if you one day read this, thank you for being so awesome. You make life fun to the max. And Christmas is next friday! I still have to do all my shopping! My sister has arranged to do this on monday. It's good to see her again. Oh well, after I decorate the tree tomorrow, I'll hopefully build some decks, get together with alex and gagne and neal, and have a geekout. If this happens, tomorrow will be a great day as well, especially if I don't wake up dead tired. Now I must bed myself. To night!

Semester Three is Terminated

Hooray for no more school. This is the best feeling ever: relief. I've pulled about 4 all-nighters in the past week, and I slept 15 hours yesterday. I did really bad at school this time around, but knowing that in the big scheme of things one semester is trivial at best, I'm not that far down. It's really good knowing that next semester will not only be wicked fun, but more it'll be more interesting and I get a fresh start as well. Haven't posted in the last while because I'm not out to set the world record for most time spent typing on a stupid blog in a month. I pretty much cracked from over stressing. My teeth no longer hurt, but my eye still twitches and I'm tired all the time. It's really tough when you spend countless hours trying to learn something and it just doesn't stick, whether from tiredness or difficulty conceptually, and then you take a test and blank. I'm thinking lack of sleep played a large role in doing so sucky, so next semester I'm getting myself in covers at an early bedtime and getting 8 hours a night instead of 0-6. So I couldn't even bring myself to take my math final today because I couldn't face looking at another test and stressing over things I didn't know the answer to and failing anyway, so I stayed and finally studied more for Mat Sci. I was up all night playing Warcraft III, not because it's amazing, but because it was a distraction from thinking about school. I was up thinking, "ok, I gotta get studying for things," but whenever I'd start to think about school I'd get depressed and frustrated again and soon I'd be back doing anything that would distract my attention from stressing. It was a really weird feeling actually accepting that I had failed calcIII, especially since I have the capacity to do well in math. Sure, I paced back in forth in my room whining to myself debating whether to go to the test just to show on the report card that I took the test, versus my overwhelmingly strong lack of confidence that I had any chance of passing, and I just didn't want to look at another test and fail it. I doubt anyone who hasn't failed a test can fully grasp how significant it is to go from being overly successful at school to sucking out hardcore, but let me tell you, it's unlike any other feeling. At least I am comforted by the fact that everyone else in my suite in my major is failing equally hard. Mark said that he would prefer that he fail alone and have his friends do well, and while I do acknowledge how unselfish this is, I would far prefer to have others sink in my boat with me. I'm not one for wanting to be the only one failing; I'd rather have others there to comfort me in knowing that other smart people fail also. Anyway, I'd known since Day 2 of this semester that these classes sucked and weren't for me, and I sure was right. How comforting it is to find out you're right. Wow, my eyes are meshing words together from blurryness slash tiredness. So I was going to get a ride from keith because he's coming back for a party and he had an empty car, but I forgot in my tired state this morning that he had already gone home and thus had an empty car, so I emailed my dad asking for him to come today or tomorrow. So far, he hasn't gotten on or responded, but I shouldn't have sent that thing. So, two things I have to look forward to now is(are?) getting reprimanded by my parents about my grades and getting talked to about why I haven't pushed hard enough to get a job. If I don't get a job I'm going to get shit about it all the time, and if I do get a job, well, then I have a job to go to and that isn't good either. Well, it should be good, to have a job and cash, but I simply have no desire for material things right now. I have a few hundred bucks still saved up and if I really want something, which wouldn't happen more than once a year, I'd get it. Otherwise, I'll keep saving it. To have a desire for money and thus work, one must desire things to buy with money, and as I don't have that, I don't have any ambition to work, other than that it will keep my parents from bugging me. Say I had someone to get presents for and spend money on, then that would be a different story. So as of now, I don't know whether this Christmas break will be totally crappy and make me hate life still, or if it will somehow be sweet. I'm leaning towards sucking to somewhere in the middle, because there will be fun things to do and fun people to hang out with, but I'm not at all looking forward to getting nagged or talked to. I've watched a bunch of movies on ebaumsworld lately, played poker, read tons of articles, and played warcraft three the last few days as a means of escaping the imminent process of thinking about school. It's been an interesting experience at least, though overall I give it 10 thumbs down. Anyways, I'm finally going to not have school to worry about! Yay freakin' wahoo! And I might even get to see my friends from home again. That would be kickin'. And I might just take up reading a few books I have sitting around in my room not getting read. But I have a lot of sleeping still to do on my schedule today, and my room is still a mess. I was just thinking, wow, I've had a lot of visitors, yet only ben has responded. So mad props to ben. Give him your thanks as he prevented me from threatening all you all. Ben is a rad cool kid at all times. So I advise you, give me some input. There's freakin at least 20 different people that have been here, all I want is a little "hey what's up. you can not trace me, you cannot detect me. sincerely, anonymous" or "i liked the post on such and such" or "what you write is interesting and makes my day better" and it may just inspire me to write you a story. I'll write a story about anything if you want me to. I'll be a friggin' monkey at the keyboard doing your bidding. Just say "write a story about a chimpanzee who couldn't skateboard" or some such and I'll be glad to excercise my brain thinkermizer muscle. So peace out, smoke weed, and drive fast around corners.

Thermo

So today I took my physics test and it went ok, ate lunch, then went to Thermo review. Unfortunately, not getting sleep impacts me sometimes and I fell asleep for about an hour of review. I can't wait for after this week! Bob and I were up all night yesterday having fun. Dustin was over and us and josh had some fun conversations in my room. We spent a lot of time on ebaumsworld.com just procrastinating for several hours. My brain isn't in type mode. It's struggling to even produce thoughts. I slept from 620-11pm today and woke up for Midnite Breakfast, which I think is the stupidest, most illogical name ever. It could be anything else. Ok josh keeps saying the LOTR special edition which came out today is the most amazing thing ever and I can't help but disagree. I have nothing of value to think now. Maybe later.

Stuff to Do

It used to be easy for me to say there was nothing to do. That is always what you say when you mean there is nothing fun to do. I'd think about the internet and think there was nothing good there on it. The trick is to find the right places to look. Any given site can have dozens or even hundreds of hours of entertainment on it. I was reading this blog tonypierce.com/blog/bloggy.htm since he has a book coming out about blogging. He writes really lazily, very unlike breakup babe's perfect spelling and punctuation. He just writes what comes into his head it seems, yet still it's structured with paragraphs. I suppose if I wrote like him, I wouldn't have problems worrying about how to punctuate properly. He's been blogging for over two years and every single day he must invest at least an hour into typing. There's just no way you can read it all. And when you think of how many bloggers there are that type that much, the amount of things people have to say is endless. I mean, it's certainly defeating to read for 4 hours and then think, wow, that was just a week's worth of blogging. And for those of you who aren't aware, I've been making an effort to swear less ever since Brian's little brother was playing Halo with us. I hadn't realized the development of my inclination to throw swear words out my mouth until then. I said, "F**k!" then, realizing I'd sworn, say "I mean shit!," then, realizing I'd still sworn, say "fuck!" then realizing I'd sworn again say "god damnit! this fucking sucks!" Finally, I realized I couldn't stop swearing so I hung my head and shook it in amazement. That was the moment I realized I had a problem swearing. The last month or so I've been nearly able to eliminate it from my vocabulary, which makes me proud that I could do something I set out to do. Of course, when I'm writing, at least once a blog I'll write an expletive out fully before catching myself and have to delete it. That's what happened when I decided to talk about swearing.
Anyways, I was talking about how much there is to read out there, but I lost my train of thought, and as it passed the passengers gave me the finger even. I loved reading tony's entry for Dec. 11th about the president. He compared america's devotion to him as an audience for the special olympics supports even the last place finisher, and Anna Kournakova said "you know its really not cool to compare retarded people to the president," and he said why, and she said "cuz its unfair to retards." That is my position on the president. I think he is a retard. It was really fun to read tony's blog because he seems a lot like me in a lot of ways, or perhaps it's how I want to turn out. He has a hot hot amazing girlfriend, yet he doesn't even own a car. He's funny and intelligent, yet he's black. Okay, totally kidding, those things aren't contradictions. But I like the topics he chooses to write about and the positions he picks for them. I'm not saying I'm a mindless reader who gets sucked into the bandwagon the writer rides because of the points he makes. I'm saying I agree with him on everything he wrote about that I read, with exception in that he blames republicans for lots of things. I generally don't categorize people into who's a republican and who isn't, because I don't think anyone is entirely one political belief. People choose the candidate they choose because he is more reputable in the eyes of others, and the few issues you remember about him supporting are those you also support. I personally think as long as the politician is smart he should keep getting reelected. Bush isn't smart. He's the dumbest president we have ever had and that bothers me. In fact, even talking or thinking about Curious George being president makes me frustrated. The yellow man should just give him his banana and he should be content not being president. But enough talk about what I think, let's hear what you think. Oh, that's right--this is my blog, I own it and you can't say anything. Unless you add a comment at the bottom of the page, but clearly this is one those impossibilities in life as nobody does that on my blog-ever. So I was thinking about how much time this man must invest writing. Every day he must come home thinking, "wow, that is so going into my blog," and he has pictures and info. about all the websites he's been to, yet he seemingly leads an active life solving crimes where he goes out each day and does things. He said "the biggest fear i have is i will come across as boring." That's how I feel. Nobody wants to be boring. They want to feel interesting and different from the billions of other people on this planet, each of whom have their own thoughts and brains and lives, because being interesting separates you from everyone else. The more people know about you, the more they'll care about you, and the more people that know about you, the more people there will be to care about you. This is why the hype over celebrities exist; people are interested in those they know about and thus care about them which makes them further interested in them. The lovable Pres. Kennedy died, and were it not for his popularity, noone would care about a single death in this country. Anyways, I have hours of studying for my physics final tomorrow and hopefully I'll do well enough that I'll pass that class. Unfortunately, I've missed some quizes, forgot to do some homeworks, missed a lot of classes in favor of sleep, been quiet in class, and failed a test or two. Consequently, it is unlikely my teacher will see it fit to pass me, and he will not care because he does not know me and he is thus uninterested in my success or failure as a student. I've heard it said that it is a teachers job to care about their students, and this completely false. It is not in one bit the slightest responsibility of the teacher to care; it is only their job to teach material and have it understood by their students. Still, I must do my best to prepare once more for this subject that will never again become relavent in my life once I exit the engineering scene, with whatever hope there is that I will be able to pass. And it's a good thing there is hope, for psycologically it adds an element to all activities and competitions that make spectating them marvelous. How exciting would it be to watch a football or basketball game if once a team got a significant lead, there was no hope by the athletes to come back and win? You have to play it by ear because there is no knowing what the future holds. Wow I've heard that too much. So seriously, I'm done writing and doing physics. Wish me fun.

Audiences

Apparently I have lost all my readers! Oh sad, sad day! I had about 5 readers a day and as many as 12 and today marks the first day nobody has gone to it. This leads me to believe for some reason you've stopped visiting. I can think of several reasons: my writing bores you, I write too much to keep up with, or I've frightened you away by saying I know who you are, which isn't necessarily true. I hope it's that I write too much and you're like Nick: "I went to your site the first day then I came back a few days later and there were 8 posts that were all 6 pages long so I said "screw this!" because if that is the reason, then it doesn't mean I'm boring you completely. If I write stuff that bores you to death, well that's just faultiness on my part. Sure I write for myself, but I want what I write to be interesting to anyone who reads it. I want whatever I write to be worth reading, because I think writing something interesting is more important than anything else in writing. Regardless of genre, people will pick out the books that interest them. For me, it's science fiction and fantasy books that fill me with intrigue. I figure if I can compile my words together with funny sentences mixed in there once in a while, it makes reading that much more interesting. So I guess this means I really am writing just for myself now, but I'll still attempt to interest myself with words. Maybe if I changed the title to Thoughts of Total Exteme Mayhem to the MAXX it would grab your attention more. Anywho, I gotta do laundry, hw, shower and eat dinner.

Christmas Glory

I decree that it is too late for me. I could/should have gone to sleep 4 hours ago. If you want to know how to live totally pointlessly, follow my lead. Today I went to my classes, but I was way tired. I wanted to sleep all day but didn't figuring I would be more tired at night if I stayed up during the day. So I ate breakfast, witnessed some warcraft III, played some oregon trail by neal's recommendation, and consequently G. Bush and his staff were killed in a couple games, and everyone in my suite was killed in a couple games. I watched Mean Girls, followed by Shaun of the Dead and Dazed and Confused. I'd rate mean girls as the best followed by Dazed and then Shaun, but they were all pleasurable time-spenders. Apparently tonight was a good night to do drugs as I left the second movie and found some friends of mine giggling with 30$ worth of munchies strewn about the room and acting retardedly. The best quote was something grammatically foul along the lines of "I feel like I talk good," and they generally acted retarded. I got myself a buffalo chicken wrap made by Larry. Larry makes the best buffalo chicken wraps b/c he loads that shit up fat and brings on more hot sauce than I can swallow. Taste buds definitely change as you age. I heard they change every seven years and this explains why as a kid I liked everything with sugar on it, and now certain foods I found repulsive are acceptable, and I used to avoid hot things but now I crave them. I played some raquetball with Nick today and thought I would do much better against him, but I only managed to beat him one out of three today. That was the one fun activity I did today basically. After that I read articles on Risk strategy for an hour and a half, then some more on Texas Holdem' and reading about it lead me to play it online and that's what I've been doing the last few hours. Since Pogo.com now charges to offer Holdem', I no longer play there, so I tried some new place. It worked smoothly and such, but it was less interactive in terms of talking, and it seemed more limited in terms of how much I could bet. The most I was down was 30$ and the most I was up was 30$ and when I quit after 2 or three hours of play, I was right back where I started, so it made me feel like I had just wasted all that time, and rightly so. Pogo at least rewarded you with spins and random prizes the more wins you acquired over the night plus it saved your records so after you played a couple hours it didn't feel like that time had simply disappeared. I can't wait until finals are over. Sure I'll get some shit about how I did shitty and have to get a shitty job workin' at a minimum wage franchise, but school will be out and I'll get to see my high school friends again. It seems kind of weird referring to those I hung out with and knew my whole life growing up as high school friends, as opposed to just regular friends. Putting the words high school makes it seem as though they're in the past, even though they continue to be my friends, and it makes me sad knowing I don't see them as much as random kids I met here. I found my hat, which is good, and now I can't wait to play Thies at Risk after reading all those strategy theories and tips. I'm kind of worried he's going to be a different person based on rumors of his drinking habits and I should talk to that kid since I haven't in months. I haven't even thought of what I'm going to buy folks for christmas this year. I think Christmas is going to suck again this year. The season has gotten less and less grand as I've gotten older. It probably peaked in terms of grandeur when I was 12, and it has gotten less and less important since then. I suppose realizing the fraudulence of St. Nick has something to do with it, along with the fact that we don't have any relatives over. Christmas day is a silent and boring day. The few presents are opened, breakfast is had, and then we set up our gifts and play with them for the day if need be. I don't even know if my sister is going to be here for Christmas this year and it makes me very sad. She's probably going to show up with her dog Max at 11am, cheerful as all hell, with Tony, and it totally won't be the same as back in the day when we woke up at about the same time and ran downstairs to see our presents Santa left us. I think a large reason Christmas sucks for me is that I don't want any presents. Last year especially and this year, I just didn't feel like I deserved any after performing so badly in school. Last year this time, I had a 3.2 and I felt like a failure for not having a 4.o. I didn't ask for anything and didn't want them to get me anything, because I felt I hadn't earned them, and if I did get something expensive, it would only make me feel bad for wasting their money. So shopping probably sucks for my parents because I don't ask for anything and can't get excited when I open up this gift they probably spent days researching and thinking about and shopping for, and this in turn makes me sad. To make Christmas grand, you need excited children running around with hopes of getting something they've been waiting and asking for for months, seeing their faces of joy, wonder and glee over the number and quality and surprise the presents in store have for them, a good breakfast meal, and several relatives. An occasion just doesn't seem that special without more people being there. Back when my grandma was chillin we would bring her down for the holiday, and even though she was so old, her presence made Christmas special. I suppose if you travel somewhere for the holidays, it would make it special, like one year we went to the Island of St. John south of Fl for Christmas, though I don't recall anything other than that. And maybe if we drove around on Christmas day with a destination and activity, it would be more special. But a day just isn't fun when you wake up fearing what presents you did not or did receive, and how you don't want your excitement to be less than the giver's expectations, and how empty the house will be with just you and your parents. Last year I recall waking up at 9am, saying "ugh it's christmas," rolling over and trying to sleep some more. The Christmas spirit just wasn't in me. I also think that not celebrating the holiday as a relation to Jesus has something to do with diminishing the holiday's spirit. To me, Christmas doesn't have any significance in terms of religion aside from recognizing that Christians are like, "yay Jesus was real!" on that day. It's more about cheer, and material exchange to show you care about those around you. It's about getting together with the overclichéd term "loved ones" for a day of celebration, but since we're not celebrating Christianity, it has to be a celebration of something more tangible, like love or being thankful for what you have or something. For being the number one Holiday of the year, it doesn't deliver, and that's why I don't look forward to it that much. I guess what bothers me most is that my sister won't be in the house when I wake up, and it signals the end of an era: an era where everyone in my family lived under the same roof and interacted with each other. Now, I'm at college and I return once every month or so, and my sister lives elsewhere with her husband and visits probably every two weeks. So actually, I'm not sure if it's the Christmas season that's got me down, or that, but either way, I need to get some Christmas cheer in me. Maybe I'll go door to door with a song in my heart, (and a knife in my hand as I rob them?) singing Christmas carols. Plus, with although Christmas is less than two weeks away, finals have everybody here so stressed and preoccupied with studies, that nobody here has had time to consider the season or put up decorations. There's not even snow on the ground and it's mid-december in New York. This just doesn't make sense. I walked down to the gym in shorts today and wasn't cold. Maybe global warming has got me down. As I recall, the month of December is supposed to be white with flakes of snowy goodness, snowmen, sledding and snow angels, but right now it reminds me of September. Crap. It's after 5am and I'm not tired. This is really going to suck when my body decides to get 14 hours of sleep and I wake up after dinner tomorrow. In fact, that would make me weep. I should be getting up at 9 or 10 to make the most out or the day, and there's no way in hell that's going to happen. Gah! Stupid body with your stupid sleep cycle that sucks tremendously! You anger me and I shake my fist at you by looking in a mirror, while at the same time entranced by how devastatingly attractive you are, and perplexed by how the ladies never seem to notice, and this concerns me. Oh well. It really is late, and even though I should start calling 5am my bedtime despite my efforts to get to sleep earlier, I should call it a night(morning?). Good night, me.

Dream and Realizations

Today was a good day in that everything of value went well. I did well on my mat sci test and did everything for my karate final correctly and my group did well and I'm sure to get an A in gym at least. On the down side, I lost my hat, and I missed math because I was studying for karate and looking for my hat, and we got our math test back already. But today I had my last seminar and my last physics lab and my last karate class and I'm almost done with the semester finally. I just have two more classes tomorrow and I'm done! I'm really looking forward to next semester not sucking, so it better not disappoint. I also got to play raquetball with Keith today, which is always good, and I feel like I'm getting better. I feel like I have a lot of room to grow still and soon I will be a great raquetball player. Last night I had some crazy dreams like none I can ever remember. It's really hard to explain and remember, but I'll try. In sum, in one dream I was this new kid that taught all the other kids to be cool and they all looked up to me even though they didn't know me. There were times when kids tried to put me down and such, but my comments were wittier and comical and caused onlookers to laugh at the bully. There was a girl involved somehow, and from whatever school I was at, there was something that needed to be fixed, a rule of some kind. So I went up to Canada, which was ruled by the British court system, along with a few other kids and entered this court room to put forth our plan and these judges would say yay or nay in order to pass it. Neal was there randomly from his college and I got confused if I was in Vermont or Canada and we commented on how strange it was we had met there. Eventually, somehow a group of college kids got unruly and protested and stormed a building. It's actually impossible to explain everything, because it was probably a good 4 or 5 hours of dreaming, and everything happens quickly in dreams. There were lots of conversations and lots of strange things to witness, and the ways characters interacted with each other was awesome too. I also remember this one part where Bob, Brian, Steve, and Fricano and I were playing some team in football and it was essential that we win this game. Many plays were made and I recall wanting to be the field goal kicker as Brian held, and even though I wound up and struck the ball perfectly, the ball only went like two feet for some reason, so I felt like I'd ruined it for the team. When we got another field goal opportunity, Bob did the kicking, but he closed his eyes as he ran up to the ball and he kicked with his left foot and drilled it down the field and it barely missed. It was crazy dreaming and impossible to explain, but the feeling of it was uplifting and respected and like a reunion with old friends. I'm going to stop attempting to write about something I can't make sense of myself now, because that would be a good idea.
On a wholly different note, I came to realize today that there are many things in life that you think you could do and spend a lot of time at. These dreams often consume my thoughts for a period of time and eventually go away when I realize it would take too much effort to accomplish them, due to a change in lifestyle. However, if friends decide to follow through this idea also, it will often become a part of your life. Like, I decided one day I wanted to learn guitar and get good at it and I practiced every day for a while, until I realized it would take a ton of work and it wasn't worth all the effort. And earlier I considered whether I wanted to pursue martial arts and follow it for a period of years and earn my black belt, but then I realize how much work is involved and the life sacrifices I would have to make. These things happen all the time to me all the time, and it seems the only ones I've followed through on are the ones that my friends also decided to do with me. I'm not sure if this applies to all people, but I'm going to assume it is so, at least to a smaller degree. So if you want me to do something, I'm in. I'm definitely someone who likes to do activities with others, even though I might appear shy, withdrawn and anti-social at first glance. It's part of this deal I got where my mind doesn't open up to people until I feel comfortable around them. Until I know the company I'm in, I won't talk or say anything unless forced to, but when I feel comfortable around who I'm with, it's a totally different story. This is probably why I don't talk to teachers, ask questions, and why I didn't talk much in my Honors classes, even though I had a lot to say. I used to be a lot worse, but I'm getting much better at dealing with strangers now. Making good first impressions is what it's all about, and the fact that I just don't care as much. I'd say it's comparable to public speaking, which comes naturally to me. You just say what you want to say and people will understand you're a person too and accept you as such. I met a couple new people today and felt comfortable with them almost immediately. It was so different from how I usually react to new people; it shocked me. Now I want to play some people in raquetball: kinger, matt thompson, matt seavey, and gagne top my list, because I've heard they play, and some of them think they're good, but I've never seen them in action. I was playing nick or Keith the other day and I was considering asking the people in the court next to us if they wanted to play us individually. I found this quite strange--that I would be the one considering interacting with people I didn't know, and I wasn't afraid to challenge people I didn't even know, but it felt normal. I read something from a poker article a while back that made a big impact on me. It said that sometimes in the game you're going to feel like you can't do something because it wouldn't be you. It wouldn't be your style. But you have to remember that everything you do is you, whether it's something you've done in the past is irrelevant. Any action you take is you doing that action. Once you realize this, you won't be constrained to feel you have to act a certain way: a way you've always acted in the past, and you can grow to be a freer, better person. It's probably this advice that has had an impact on me recently the most in how I act around people, and I think it is for the better. Happy Hanukkah.

I Missed a Meeting

One of the perks of being me is that you get to experience the full spectrum of sanity. I never ended up getting sleep last night, due largely in part to my roommate's insistence that since going to sleep would cause me to not wake up, and he kept taking my pillows away, flipping my mattress, taking my blankets and, when I was on the couch, taking the cushions away. Just because it was 6am, and I hadn't made it to all my morning classes the previous two days before it because of alarm clock malfunctions doesn't mean that it would have happened again. So today I was completely out of it, very giddy according to Mark. But it was fun, especially the part where I took my math test. Or how about when I got my physics test back and corrections had already been posted so I couldn't do corrections? Anyways, being out of it means that nothing really hits you, so you're just like, "oh, it would appear that this happened," and you can continue smiling. It's quite fun to be crazy: like you're not yourself at all, but at the same time you are. After breakfast with Josh and classes and lunch I finally got to sleep about 5pm. This means that I fell asleep while sitting in Bob's bed watching Nick play Grand Theft Auto. So at 530 I woke up enough to walk into my room, set my alarm for 8pm so I could wake up and shower for my karate meeting with my group, and fell right back asleep. Lucky for me, things always work out in my favor. I woke up at 9:58. So...yeah I'd missed my practice for the final. And I wondered, "what! no! why?" and then I saw my alarm clock was sleeping in bed with me on my shirt. I had had the sense of mind to set my alarm, but then I didn't put it back on my desk before falling asleep, and since the wind-up alarm just has a little knob you push in to keep it from going off, this is undoubtedly what had happened. Dah! What makes it worse is that the people in my group consist of hot girls! The only time in the week I get to associate myself with their presence and I ruined my chances that I didn't already have. So now I get to just show up tomorrow and be like, "sorry I didn't make it guys," and that will be the end of that. They won't get the whole deal of how I remembered and tried and despite my efforts, I still let them down like it was my business. In the words of Mark, "it was destined to happen." Destiny is such a load of crap and I don't want to hear about how I got screwed over for the millionth more time because of destiny. It wasn't fate that I got my alarm clock that never wakes me up; it just happens that my mom spotted a nine-dollar shiny thing in Walmart and decided that it would be a great thing to give Casey for college. End of story. Fate was not involved. Point is, even though it might be nice and comforting to think that the reason bad things happen are because they were fated and there was nothing I could have done to make them occur otherwise, in my opinion, that's a load of crap; there's always something you could have done different. As my friend ben says, "nothing happens for a reason, one just makes up a reason for each happening." On another note, something that bugs me, other than the fact that I have a test and my karate final tomorrow, is I don't know how to punctuate. I can never remember when to use a comma versus a semi-colon or a colon or when I should just make them different sentences. All I can remember about puntuation was from 11th/12th grade (they were one year for me) English with Mr. Moore. I remember something about if two sentences are linked then you use a semi, but you also have the option of just making them separate sentences. Then there was something like: if you're going to begin a list you use colons. Sometimes, when you're stressing a few brief really important words you lead up to it with a hyphen, and that just adds one more element to the equation of confusion. At this point, I have no idea whether I'm doing any of this punctuating correctly and every couple minutes I keep running into another instance where I don't know how to puntuate and I just guess and keep going. I have enough trouble trying to remember where to insert commas. I don't think I should be messing with all this extra semi-colon/colon/hyphen punctuation crap. Writing would be so much easier if I just knew the basic mechanics of how to punctuate. So hopefully when I'm in writing II next semester I'll get to solve this mystery and the dark cave that is my knowledge of punctuation will be enlightened, or something of that nature. Time to get some sleep. True, it's always a good time to get some sleep, but 420am is probably "more gooder" and highly qualified for the position of good times to be sleeping. I need rest though, seriously. Wish me luck on my tests and final and such. (If you don't, I will cast an evil spell upon you.) Toodle.

How Are You?

Whenever someone used to ask me the question, "how are you?" I never used to give it any thought. I would always respond I was good or great or never been better. I was just trained that those were the propper responses to give someone. Whenever someone was told I was good, they were satisfied and it made them happier. If I responded that I felt like crap and hated life, that wouldn't make them feel very good. They would probably follow up their question with more questions like "why?" or "what's wrong?" and then I would either be forced to talk about how much my life sucks, which would only bore them more, or tell them I didn't want to talk about it. Since I didn't want to talk about it, I told them I was fine. Even if they care, there's nothing they can do to help, especially since I wouldn't let them. After all, I know everything I need to do. I know how to fix my problems, I just can't bring myself to do them, which is why I'm only dooming myself. I keep thinking this semester is a nightmare but it just won't end. Why do I hate this semester? There are so many reasons. It's just a series of things that have gone awry based on character flaws of my own. I don't do well in a non-structured environment. I don't do well when things are going on all the time. I don't do well going off and doing things on my own. I learn best in groups, but I'm not good at meeting people so I'm stuck with the people in my suite. And they don't want to help me, they'd rather work alone. People like Maggie give reason's like, "maybe if you were in class you'd understand," and then laugh and not explain or answer my question. I think I'm giving up on math and physics, I'm just going to fail those classes. I feel like I've felt them already and even if I wrench my heart stressing over this stuff, I'm not going to learn it enough to pass. And even if somehow I break out with a D, a D won't transfer to another school so it's just a waste of a class anyway. The only benefit passing with a D would give is that it would be a 1 instead of a 0 on my gpa. Seems to me, if you take away all things that a person is good at, he's not going to enjoy life. It's almost like the only difference between enjoying my stay here and not enjoying it is a couple letter grades. If I had A's, I would be having a blast and actually like it here. But that's not the case. This would be a good time when I would love to just hug my dog for hours. So from now on, I've gone so far down hill from where I was a couple years ago, that when someone asks how I am, I'm just going to tell them life sucks. Then I'll at least be telling the truth, even if it compensates the fact that they won't be pleased with my answer. So now I'll have to deal with telling my parents I sucked out at school and failed a bunch of classes even though I keep getting told to break my back for the last stretch and manage whatever I can. "You can at least get a 2.0 can't you?" Yeah, I get questions like that. So how am I? I feel like shit and I'm stressed to the max and I feel like life's been sucked out of me. At least I can take a little bit of comfort knowing that life can't get any worse than this. I'm at the lowest point in my life, and things can only go up from here. I learned that from trying to sell shares of stock, that had only gone down in value steadily for a course of several months, for a presentation in economics. Taking all these math science courses sucks. Throughout school I was good at everything, but I always knew I was worst at math and particularly science. Yet here I am, a major in ceramic engineering taking nothing but math and science courses that don't interest me in the least and I can't learn the material. Plus my sleep schedule is fucked up the ass so that takes away the part where I go to all my classes and know what's going on. Hmm. I wonder if I should go to FLCC next year. I definitely need everything to change if I'm going to get my grades back under control again. School makes me not want to go to school. So now that I'm all pumped up for school, I better go read my textbook for that math test I have tomorrow.

yay for math

Today I woke up when Josh was coming into the room and I asked, "what day is it?" I assumed it was saturday but I couldn't remember. It was tuesday and the clock read 1:50 which meant I had missed Physics already and I also thought I had mat. sci at 1:20 which I thought I missed. Luckily, I don't have materials science on tuesdays. Too bad I don't know my schedule by now. I then informed Josh I had a class at 5pm and he said he'd wake me up no problem by then and I went back to sleep. So I woke up at 4:50 and josh was sleeping so I threw on some clothes and got there just on time. Bla bla bla. I had karate and then keith and I played raquetball instead of lifting and that was fun. He's better than I remember him being and he beat me two out of three games but he definitely helped me improve my game today and it was fun. So now I'm sitting here with a math test tomorrow at 11:20 am that I have no idea what to do about. I don't recall missing any classes, except one last thursday, but somehow I have no idea what is going on and I'm going to completely fail this next test. Normally I'd be completely flipping out but now it feels so hopeless that no matter how much I study tonight I'm still going to bomb it. I kind of just want to give up and sleep and accept that I will fail that class. I completely lack any ambition to do anything but go to sleep, b/c for once I'm actually tired as hell at a decent hour, but now I have work to do. Yesterday, when I had nothing to do I wasn't tired at all and I ended up missing my classes. Now, when I have tons to do, I'm super tired and feel like crap. My left eye is still twitching. It's almost more of a pulsing and it's really annoying and there's nothing I can do about it. I eat my bananas and it still likes to twitch so I don't know what its deal is. Oh, and what's better, that physics test that I did horribly on was handed back monday and corrections are due tomorrow morning. Since I somehow haven't woken up for monday or tuesday's classes, I can't have my test back and do corrections on it. So that's just one more reason to feel good about myself. My only hope is to go and talk to him and he'll probably just say sorry, too bad you missed out on two days of classes--you messed up. I think I'm just going to take a nap and set my untrustworthy alarm for 3am or some such time. After I get told I failed math and can't do corrections, then I get to go fail a math test, and then go to two more classes after that. Finally, I'll get to study for a material's science test, practice karate with my group, and study for my karate final on thursday. Looks like rest and relaxation after a fun day, wouldn't you agree?

Not asleep yet--story time!

Crap crap friggin crap! I'm not asleep. Things have not gone according to plan. I saw Ocean's Eleven for the first time, which I highly approve of, but it took me about an hour to be able to play a movie on my stupid-ass computer. That's right: it has a stupid ass. I don't know where it is...but it's there. It hasn't been this stupid before, so maybe it was just having a bad day. If it happens again though, I will have no sympathy and this thing is going out the window. Not my window, b/c that would cause damages that I would have to pay for. It would probably go out the common area window, the one on the far right because it has easy access. I have a test class tomorrow at 5pm that I'll probably forget about, and karate and lifting and a math test to study for, plus I have physics in the morning that will be tough to wake up for. I'm still not tired at all. Not even in the teensiest way. Oh bother...nothing to do. I need some tranquilizers, so I should probably visit a zoo sometime in the near future. I know! I'll write a story without any planning at all!
Once there was a man...Yes. He was male. He had a penis and everything. Okay, so this guy, his name was Alfonzo, decided one day to take a trip to his car. So he walked out of his bathroom and opened up the front door to go to his paved driveway. Oh no! His car was gone! "Dude, where's my car?" Alfonzo exclaimed. "Dude, where's your pants?" inquired Elisha, a ghetto-ed-up drug dealer pushing on the corner several yards away. He soon realized that he wasn't wearing pants, but this was no time for details in what he was or wasn't wearing; he had to find his car! At this time, a panda bear pranced down the street as a tight rope walker tripped and fell (completely unacceptable). He of course knew it was a tight rope walker because his name was Jeff and he was best pals with Alfonzo, the milk man. Anyways, Alfonzo had a car to find. Plus, he was late for work so he grabbed the nearest Milk Truck and began his route, placing milk on people's doorsteps, getting invited into desperate housewives homes for some catching up and some sex, and eliminating dogs that chased him using a catapult he carried with him. Soon enough, he stumbled upon what appeared to be his truck and made off with it. He had forgotten his license plate number, but the color was right, so he could only assume it was his. However, this car wasn't his. It wasn't even a car, it was a boxcar made by some local children named Nick. Yes--all the children were named Nick in this neighborhood. Anyways, soon he arrived at the bottom of the hill and couldn't go any further so he pushed it to the nearest gas station. He pushed up to the service pump and a guy came out with a puzzled look on his face. "Are you serious? This car doesn't run on gas!" explained the service pump man, Ooglebundle. "Now you listen to me," shouted Alfonzo. "Don't go telling me you're not going to fill up my car just because it "doesn't have a tank"(he used quotey fingers to stress his point). I want that car full of gas NOW!" Ooglebundle didn't like his tone of voice, plus he was already angry because he'd just lost his favorite issue of Time Magazine, so this pushed him over the edge. "I'm not going to fill up your boxcar full of gas! Where will I put it? In where you sit down?" Alfonzo wasn't one to take crap and he flipped out. "How dare you call my car a boxcar! Just because I'm not wealthy or handsome looking like you doesn't mean you can insult my belongings and not give me service. I'm calling my lawyer," he bluffed as he pulled out a switchblade. "Take this!" Ooglebundle grabbed the pump, pulled the trigger to release some high pressured gasoline upon the unwary Alfonzo, then breathed fire out of his mouth, ingniting the gasoline into a giant spray of fire. Luckily, Alfonzo was used to this kind of thing and leaned forward, using his super heat-absorbent head to soak up the blast. Ooglebundle was outraged and turned into a giant dragon with purple wings and flew away. Alfonzo was hot-headed after this exchange of events, and wasn't going to cool-down any time soon. He decided to take out his aggression on a five-year old girl named Linda--he took away her lolly pop! This made Linda cry and Alfonzo didn't deal well with cry babies, so he ate her. Linda's mother was nearby and witnessed the whole thing. She was delighted. "You ate my child! Let's celebrate!" So Linda cordially invited Alfonzo to her home where they told stories and had a grand time. They became best friends for many years after that, and they even moved in together, until one day Linda killed Alfonzo because he left the toilet seat up one too many times. That was the end of him. Linda then became a disc jockey traveling from club to club bringing her new style of music to the music scene. We would later know Linda as Linda the Soft, but that's another story.

Knee of Pain!

Wehh. My knee hurts. Nick and I played raquetball and it was fun to the maxxx! I was sliding and diving everywhere and we ran into walls on several occasions. Unfortunately, the floors are hard and my knee likes to hit it often and now it is in pain. Nick beats me but it's ok. I lose like 14-16, 16-18 and games last quite a while because I don't like giving up points and it's hella fun. Exercise makes me feel good! I can't beat minesweeper. Rage Against the Machine is good. I have some tests this week and a final. I should be studying and it's another of those times when I don't want to do anything. Maybe I should attempt to get sleep tonight again. We had a hall meeting. My plan was that first I would wait for the hall meeting, then show up fashionably late for the hall meeting, I would "forget" my #2 pencil we're supposed to bring, then have to go get it. I would then return 10 minutes later and complain that it was over so soon, say I had trouble finding a pencil and throw a huge fit when they tell me the meeting is over and I missed it. They will try to write me up for missing the stupid meeting, but I would resist with all my force, and throw every citation of prejudiced cases at them I can think of. I would take them to court for being racist and win all of my tuition back. That was my goal and it somehow it didn't work.

Doot Doot Doo!

Sleep is the one time when I think during the day. Not actual sleep, but the part right before it. I'll lie down and not be tired, but think, "I should really get some sleep so I'm rested in the morning." That's the cue for my brain to turn on and start thinking about a billion things at once. They're not entirely important ideas--just things like, well...this is an example of what I think about as I'm trying to go to sleep: Fighting is the ultimate competitions as it pits one being against another. All people have the competitive urge inside them to some degree as related to the amount of how much testosterone versus estrogen they have. Time traveling ninjas are cool. We already know everything about this world we'll ever know. When we read or hear something "new" to us, it is merely our mind agreeing with information. I guess this speaks conceptually only. Minor details, specifics of current events; these things are insignificant by comparison to concepts such as advice one might give, but more along the lines of things comedians like to point out. It's true and funny, but we know it already. He's just restating it in a funny manner. I believe comedians are funny because they see the world in a different way than us. Two men(or women, for you sexists out there) can see the same thing happen, but the comedian will tell a far funnier story because he sees it differently. We are already who we are, and when someone comments ten years later how different we've become, it's merely us showing a different phase of ourselves. Our mind will undergo phases like a rotating door; depending on how it is turned, that is how your personality will be throughout your life. Some doors turn more slowly than others, of course. Our minds want to experience lots of different characters and events and by changing it can experience them in a more complete way. Writing is a good occupation in my opinion. Many jobs people have are quit because they feel trapped as they do the same thing day after day. Job changes occur because people want to experience something new. When they don't occur, it is because financially and romantically they are secure and don't wish to ruin it because of some qualms about leading a boring life. With writing, you can stretch the imagination to its fullest extent and experieince the full spectrum of life by creating it on paper. Actors get to act in various movies is they're good enough, so they get the diversified feelings and lifestyles their characters feel in their many situations. As a writer, you're given or can create those same multitudinous experiences, situtuations, feelings, environments, characters--everything. Writing and performing music is another great profession as it gives people something to think about. A song may be played repeatedly on a daily basis on MTV and the radio, but any given person will only hear it X number of times through that medium. If they're like me, however, that song will come back to their mind whenever the mood or situation strikes them. It gives them peace of mind, or a sense of coolness or happiness; anything they want, at a price of nothing once their mind has learned the song. Songs, lyrics, tunes, beats, solos; these pop into my head every day for no particular reason I can fathom, but everything my head plays for me I have heard at some point. So just because the song is off the air, a movie hasn't been seen in years and a book hasn't been read since high school, doesn't mean it won't affect their life after that. It is the series of events a person witnesses that change their life's path by minute increments. My argument is that, on an extreme scale, if everyone witnessed the exact same experiences every day, they would be far less different. Make their minds and physical bodies genetically the same, and you've taken away all things that make people witness the same event in a different manner and thus, people would agree on everything. Agreeing on everything would create a world of complete boredom, so people would still claim they disagree to appear different and strike up attention from others for the world is nothing without difference of opinion. That person would carry out their claim to their best ability to the extent that they believe it themselves and thus become different. This clearly goes along with the theory of entropy, that the universe tends towards disorder, for even when everything starts the same, it will mutate towards chaos. God, if there is one, has been around far too long to be content watching the same TV reruns. He wants drama and change so he doesn't get bored. I am bored, not tired, and I'm thinking things I already know. People like getting retold information though ("tell that story again!") even if they know it. Telling people things they already know won't bother them. They will be intrigued and if they think, "I already knew that" they will only feel smarter and continue to read. You don't have to tell them new things to keep their attention. Typing is dial-up while thinking is cable. A machine that can put thoughts on paper takes away the hand that is the resistance in the copper wire, resisting the flow of electrons from point A to point B. It sure would be great to have one of those, and I believe it is possible to read brainwaves to the exact point of what words are being said. All you need is the right converter, no?
Of course, my mind thinks of things far faster than this, but the ideas are there, those that I can remember and type in time before I move on to the next one. I don't really know what I'm doing, but I guess one might call it reflecting? Reflecting is rather pointless in my opinion(or is it?). Confucious didn't get wise by sitting on a hill and thinking for a period of years(or did he?). I think wisdom comes from interacting with people: that is how you learn the most. Meditating and such reflection only makes something you already know more apparent as it is phrased in a different way. Hmm...I wonder if anyone reading this is amused by my ramblings or if I've completely bored you. Regardless, you've read this far, so you must be intrigued. A cow stapled to a wall is a strange thought. I'm kind of curious if anyone else thinks of things such as this or if I'm just crazy. What do other people think about?? This is something I would actually like to know so comment on this post, anonymously if you wish, or IM me, or just tell me what you think about something, like whether I'm completely boring you and crazy, or if this is interesting to think about, something! I'm runnin' on thin air here. Despite this request, I somehow doubt anyone will respond. Is it out of fear that I'll know you're reading this? Probably. Rest assured, I already know who you are. There is no escape. I have many visitors to this site and especially if you labeled your computer name with your name, I know who you are. That's right--Casey knows who you are. Oh and comments like, "you need some psychiatric help," are pointless as I already know this, but you can tell me if you like. I think I'm crazy right now, so I may just end up deleting this post when I read it later and decide it's a complete ramble of crap. Techno tickles the brain. I should probably get more sleep than I get. If I did, I would probably think more logically, less non-logically, more coherently, less sporadically--things of that nature. Oh boy, Josh just decided to go to sleep! That means no more music and thus my desire to write goes out the window. I will only write if I have some good music and I've been cut-off. I'm afraid my RD is going to send me to the crazy-house. Oh well, I had a good run.

Purpose

So apparently I was confronted by a certain someone who told me everyone in my suite knows about this site, (something I already knew) just so I wouldn't write things thinking they wouldn't be read. Well, I wouldn't have put it in my profile if I didn't want people to read it. I'm perfectly aware of what I'm doing. If something is bothering me I'll write about it and sooner or later people will catch on, that's part of why I complain. I'd also like to let people know I'm not going to censor what I write based on who will be reading it. I'll write what I want to write, how I want it written, when I want to write it because writing is my right, and writing gives you power. Thoughts truly are pointless unless you do something about them, act on them, so expressing my thoughts makes them count for something. I'm not one who's great at voicing my opinion vocally, but I feel plenty free writing about it for some reason. I guess that's why I don't like phones but I love AIM. I also write because it gives me something to do that's productive, as opposed to watching TV for example, which I consider a waste of time, most of the time. Also, if I'm going to get any good at writing, it takes practice using words and putting them together properly, and I'd like to improve my writing. I've always considered myself a good writer, and the more time I spend on it, the better I will become. I should definitely read more though to improve vocabulary and learn different styles of writing. So I guess what I'm trying to say is: I'm aware of my audience but I'm not going to write towards that audience. I'm writing exclusively for myself and if others wish to see what I want to write about, they're welcome. Thanks for tuning in various college students, may you have a wonderful night.

Sunday

Yesterday there was no post because I was actually doing things. I woke up at 1030 after 5 hours of sleep and went down to Barresi to play Halo with Kinger on the projector and I learned to sword sail across the map which is awesome. Then I went back and had lunch at Powell with nick, mark, bob, josh, which was later proceeded by the amazing activity of raquetball with nick. (I used the word amazing in this instance because it is the right word to describe it.) I also later played pool with nick later, then Bob's friends came over: J.O.N., Jeff and AJ I believe. I wandered around campus a couple times and watched kinger and killian play on Xbox Live and that was really fun. Listening to people talk is quite fun in itself, and add to that Killian's trash talking and you have a comedy act. When Kinger left I took over at about 12 and played until 420 and it was hot. This one sniper game I came in first out of everyone, and our 16+ opponents were really good. I was playing magically it was funny how good I was sniping. At one point in the game I was leading by 12! And at all times, people have an equal shot at killing you with their sniper rifle, so it's not like I just find a bitch spot and weapon and shoot from there. At one point I jumped down from a high window and shot a guy a ways away in the face! Many other times I shot people jumping through the air in the face, I would lead ahead and shoot people when they crossed this tiny space that wasn't cover, it was just perfect, like I couldn't miss. I had 80% accuracy and 29 head shots, the most kills and the least deaths with 21 and I was quite happy with my accomplishment. For note of reference how good these people were, Killian ended up getting a close fourth I believe. I need to shut up about Halo though, even though I love that game. So I went to bed at 430 or so and woke up today at 545 with messages from my dad who was displeased with how I was playing Halo since my away message said "Halo is amazing." His response was, "I don't NO if U heard. Work is a 4 letter word," as though I wasn't working and just playing Halo instead. It made me not want to wake up. Now I must eat because everyone else already has had pizza.

Epitaph

Suddenly she was there, walking down the empty hallway towards him. The voices of his buddies went numb as his heart raced and all he could think to do was act natural. He fumbled against the wall he was leaning against, trying to find a more natural stance while making his best effort to avoid looking at her luscious form. He could not. Just when realized that he had not once looked away from her since seeing her walk towards him, their eyes met. She seemed to smile back, but he knew not whether it was of simple politeness or similar thoughts about him. Often when passing, she would wave or say a polite hello and he had managed to deal with those events. He had wondered in the past if she had noticed him (had she just glanced at him?), but never convinced himself he should do anything about it. Well, that's not true. He had convinced himself it was necessary, and he repeatedly had "no choice" but to say something to her day after day, but somehow when he was in sight of her, all words left him. It was all he could do to keep from staring every time he was within sight of her. And she had caught him looking at her time and time again, despite his strong effort to not let her know he had a crush on her. He had thought of all the right words to use, a thousand charming ways to innocently begin a conversation with her, but each night he would have to go to sleep thinking up a better line. Perhaps she wasn't the right one since he couldn't bring himself to talk to her. He would certainly never be able to act natural in her presence, so he pushed it to the back of his mind. Eventually, thoughts of the girl numbered less and less each day, and he could live life again without having to think of this "problem." He knew he was dooming himself, but his shyness condemned him. Twenty years later he told his buddies of how he had once believed he loved someone, but their married asses felt no pity for him. "You shoulda just asked her out, then you'd know whether she was the one, man." Twenty years later, those words would haunt him every day while he drove in his empty car on his way to work in the morning, every day on his way back, and in between coffee breaks and day-dreams. He no longer even wanted to find anyone else. He knew had blown his chance. His gravestone reveals nothing of his situation, for printed next to his name lies the name of his age-old crush--next to him for all eternity. Visitors to the graveyard assumed she had been his wife, for he had engraved an imagined birthday and death-date for her as well, along with loving words for her. Finally there was the epitaph covered in dirt that no one would see: "Our love will go on."

Exciting Friday Night!

Since eating at 5 I have sat in my room and played online poker in silence b/c josh was sleeping. Josh got up at 10 so that means 4 hrs of poker, then I played minesweeper for another hour something. My teeth hurt desperately bad because I grind them when I'm just sitting here. Well it's not grinding, just compressing them together and now my gums hurt and some of my teeth wiggle now. I don't even mean to mash them, it just happens from being stressed I guess. I believe I need some sort of sport or physical activity to get this aggression out of me, because having hurting teeth is painful. I was thinking chewing gum would help but it doesn't. I'm not even tired even though I didn't sleep yesterday and I only napped from 11-230, but I'm gunna try to get my sleep in, and then I'll wake up, eat breakfast and head over to Reimer by 10. For some reason, I don't think it's healthy to sit in a chair for 6 hours looking at a computer screen not saying anything to anyone, but at least since Josh got up I've had techno action goin on, which makes me anti-angry. Perhaps a shower will suffice for now.

Meeting of Doom

I somehow woke up for the meeting and went to it b/c josh was all like "get up ya lazy bastard." And I was not pleased about having to walk through the ice and snow all the way there. Turns out, everyone knew what the meeting was about but me, they just hadn't told me! Wow. That's a shocker. Bob and Josh are like: "I have nooooo idea what this is about." They were the ones that called for the meeting. Apparently there were awkward silences and problems that needed to be voiced, but mostly it was about how I didn't say anything after they ditched me and went to syracuse, and they wanted to talk about it. Also, Bob hid Halo because he didn't want me to play it anymore! Sure, Brian was like "idk where it is" and so did bob, and despite my asking to play they didn't say no so much as just avoided looking for it. I guess that's one of the things that really pisses me off about these people is that they're not direct, especially Bob. Like I'll ask, "you wanna play this? or this or go do this?" and he'll be like "eh, not right now. I'll play later." He always says not now: later, when he has no intentions whatsoever of doing what he said. It's just that instead of telling me no, he says maybe. I guess I just wish for a little more bluntness around this group so I know what's going on. Well everyone said sorry about going to syracuse without me, like that counts for shit, but it was apparently because it was to go play Halo, and they don't like me when I play halo. It's understandable. I love it the most; I yell and shout and such when I play that game. But I didn't understand why they left to go play halo, a game I played and loved more than anyone in that suite, and left without me. I just didn't realize it bothered anyone else because they never said anything. They could have been like, "it's really annoying when you do that" and I respond really well to that kind of thing, because I don't like being annoying if I can help it, so I would have certainly played calmly. Well, apparently it's better for them to say nothing to me, hide the game, and then call a meeting behind my back, because that's how mature people do business. Fortunately, Kinger might be the man to save me from my Haloless existence since he invited me to Reimer for Halo2 all day tomorrow on a projection screen with surround sound! I hope it pulls through. Tomorrow could possibly be a great great day.

Just so You Know

My new goal is to wear a Peter Pan cap. I will wear this everywhere I go and I will look spiffy as hell. Peter Pan was nothing without his cap. Lots a folks can fly, but how many have a green hat? This is what I want for Christmas or for any other time you can find to give it to me. But I will get one, I assure you. Ebay must have it!

Self-Esteem

Seems fitting that I should write about self-esteem after a test, but if something is good for you, you should keep doing it, and if it's bad for you you should quit. Cigarettes are bad so you should quit. School is bad for my self-esteem so I should quit. I feel smart whenever I'm not taking tests, then tests make me think I'm dumb again. Tests are the worst invention ever. If only I had taken one more 3 credit class, then I could drop math and physics and still have 12 credits, and then I would only have two other bad grades; thermo and mat. sci. Shame I didn't think to do that earlier. Rather than pity myself, I will go to sleep. I have no more classes today, but it doesn't really matter. My day has already been ruined.

Dqahhhhh!! I don't like esceula. I've been studying for far too long in increments of time strung together continuously without stop forever I'm tired!Blahhhhhhhhh. ANgry FacE! It's bright outside and there's snow everywhere! If I had a giant flamethrower, I would walk with it to class and noone would get in my way. In Japan they have big rooms that are designed with things in them specifically for being destroyed and angry japanese people pay to rent this room for an hour and they can destroy everything in it!! This is a fantastic idea and I want one of these rooms right now so I can break stuff and create stupendous mahem. How did i manage to study for 5 straight hours without flinching? Answer: No idea! But I still have more studying to go and it's crazy dumb. But the physics book is really cool: if you read everything a billion times, it almost sinks in! Actually, my frustration turned to joy when I discovered there were answers to the quiz questions in the book at the end of the section! Hooray for answers to my questions! After this test I'm going back to bed and then I have this super gay meeting at 3pm that I don't want to wake up for. Well, I just took a 40 minute break and I must avenge myself.

Night before a Test

So it's almost midnight and I haven't started studying for physics. Just can't bring myself to do it yet. Far too tired, or sick, but I definitely am having difficulties getting motivated. I know I have to do it though, so I will study until I am content, regardless of whether I get sleep tonight. I had karate and lifted today and that was good. And there was shrimp for dinner. I guess I feel defeated. I watched Without a Trace after came back exhausted from lifting, and it was about this middle schooler who went missing. It turned out he wasn't kidnapped; he just ran away and hung himself because of some terrible things that happened to him. Felt really bad for him, and angry at the girls that treated him so mean. I lied down on Nick's bed and Mark and Rachel were talking as they had been for well over an hour. Rachel is doing really well and mark is doing really bad obviously. I guess he's having at least as bad a time here as me; worse in some instances, better in others. I looked on his website http://people.alfred.edu/~mar3/ and looked under shoutouts and I wonder...is there a name missing? He has shoutouts for three people at home, and one for Bob, Nick, Josh, and Brian. Hmmm. Isn't there one more person in the suite? I guess not. I certainly don't deserve a shoutout. Clearly, I am not one of the "us" that constitutes this suite. Just one more example of how I feel left out and unloved here. And I guess Josh isn't doing too well. He's the one person in this suite I thought was doing well besides Nick. I mean, his grades are so high, and he's not taking shitty ass courses like us, and he doesn't have girl problems like most everyone else. He just sleeps a hell of a lot during the day. Seems like sleep is the thing to do when you're depressed. Bob sleeps all day and misses his classes fairly regularly, and I don't doubt that he's having a tough time with life. I think he thinks he's smarter than he really is, or maybe I'm just missing something. I noticed a Mensa test sitting on his desk and the highest score range was circled, saying he was the brightest in the nation, so maybe he really is smart somehow. I guess I'm just a super egocentric bastard that doesn't think people in this suite are smarter than me. So, Brian and I are changing majors next semester because we hate our major with a passion, and Bob, if he returns, which I doubt, will take mostly non-ceramics courses but stay in the program because of its cheapness. Mark says Bob's plan so far is to come back next semester and have a fresh start and be on probation, but I can't see it happening. I think it pisses me off more than anyone that Bob is doing badly, and there's nothing I can do about it to help him, which pisses me off more. Point is, our suite is cursed with bad grades and having a bad time, well--except for Nick, who's just plain smart and likes engineering and does everything right as far as I'm concerned. It'd be nice if I had it a bit more like Nick, but I guess I'm smart enough, I've just gotta use it right. Well, we'll see what concerns have been aroused amongst the staff at the meeting tomorrow. My guess is it has to do with grades or maybe looking depressed in class and missing classes? I can't guess what else "staff" could express concerns to our RD about. I'm gunna get some spaghetti made, and get some pop from the vending machines and try to get in the studying mindset.

Sick=Sleep time

When my alarm went off today at 930 I entered the world of the concious. It is a simple wind-up alarm that only needs a buttom pushed on the back of it to turn it off. I usually pick up the whole thing and smash it on my bed to turn it off, but today when I tried to turn it off with my finger. I ended up not being able to find it with my finger as it rang obnoxiously so I picked it up and smashed it on my bed three times before it turned off. I had wanted to take a shower before my first class but I was clearly too tired for that so I figured I would sleep another half-hour and then wake up for math. Well that half hour passed, and so did five more hours and I woke up at three. So I missed all my classes up to date, but whereas normally this would be four classes, I feel like I only missed two, and I'm justified. My physics lab was cancelled, and we're allowed two or three absences in seminar and this is my first, so I really only ended up missing math and mat. sci. Since I'm sick I feel like I needed the extra sleep to get healthy anyway, plus I have a physics test tomorrow morning, so sleep should help me think better on it. Plus I would have been way ultra super tired in my classes today. I still have karate and weightlifting to do today anyway, as well as study for many many hours for physics. I still have this really low hacking cough and a runny nose, and a minor headache, but I otherwise feel fine and rested. I don't really feel like doing anything else and my suite is completely quiet other than my crazy techno, so it's a rather lazy atmosphere. Oh--I ended up downloading trillian and I'm not a fan. Neal had claimed it was good but nay; it sucks. I don't like it's extra features and I prefer AIM so I'm switching back. I'm also going to get started on my physics.

The Stick Man

Myself and a group of angered people stormed up to him. He was extremely thin, passive looking, and the color and texture of white oak. He appeared to be waiting for us with an explanation but we didn't care for it. We argued a bit before finally kicking his ass. After a time, some of the people decided to have mercy on him, while others were convinced the only punishment proper for his deed was death. I lead the latter group, tied him to a log and pushed it over the bank into the river. He floated down and we watched him. He didn't appear concerned at all. He would escape! Just as he bent over the crest of the 100 foot waterfall, I decided to follow him down to finish his life. I flew through the air after him and grabbed as much air as I could before plunging down into the water below. Down we went. Deep down. With his waterlogged log attached to him, he sank much faster, but I swam to him, knife ready. I lost site of him in the murky depths, and realized I did not have the velocity needed to reach the bottom to push off and make it to the surface and he did. Suddenly he was shooting past me to the surface and I immediately pursued. My air ran low and my lungs ached but somehow I managed to make it to the surface. I looked about and made my way into the cave nearby. The stick-man was no where in sight. Suddenly he was at me from behind the shadows, and my knife skid across the rocky floor into an unseen corner. Our brief amount of fighting was soon halted as a noise echoed from deeper in the cave. My heart filled with fear and my stomach clenched tight. I made one last effort to throw him into the direction of the unknown monster before scrambling in the direction to the left of the echo, deeper yet into the cave. As the cave lightened, I stumbled upon two men standing together having a chat. The cave provided a ramp to my right or a path straight past the men towards the sunlight. They stopped as I entered, giving me a laugh. Something was said about how I shouldn't have done that, and a robot with a laser in the center of the room turned on and faced me. Instinctively I lunged out of the way as a beam was fired and knocked some stalactites to the floor. I scrambled up the ramp looking for safety from this unknown laser robot. I immediately entered a second floor altogether directly above the robot and paused thinking I was safe, when I looked at my feet and saw the laser penetrating through the floor somehow. A barely dodged to my right as a the floor exploded, and the laser followed where I was. It could see me through the floor! I believed I had the reload time down and stood in the path of the laser for the 1.5 seconds until it fired and I dodged it to the right over and over. I heard the men below me mutter something about it running out after ten shots but I had no time to comprehend it all as my adrenaline had shot my heart rate through the roof. As I turned to jump the last time, I tripped on some rocks on the ground and couldn't dodge it's beam. A searing pain shot straight through my left thigh, but it was already cauterized and I could still use my leg. I looked up and saw this room also led towards light and I hastily exited the cave with my injured leg. Blinded for a moment by the brightness of the sun's glare, my eyes adjusted to find myself surrounded by a tribe of thirty of these creatures resembling walking sticks, and the man who I had lost track of led them. They formed a circular clearing in the forest around me and I was in no position to fight them off. The man slowly and silently approached me as I tried to calm myself from my adrenaline. I looked up at him, with wide eyes hoping for mercy, when suddenly everything went black and I fell unconcious to the floor.

Boring Women

Don't believe what they tell you. Hanging out with women isn't all it's cracked up to be, at least not with me, or at least not the girls we hang out with. Josh, mark and I went over to their suite as invited and...nothing of any importance. TV was watched, and that was it. The lesson learned is to never leave the comfort of your own suite when certain entertainment is not guaranteed. It's far more fun when they come over here, clearly. So I guess what I'm saying is this; if you want to have fun, come over here, unless you're going for a different kind of fun, then I'll be glad to go out of my way. I mean a different kind of fun like...oh nevermind you sick minded demonic politicians. A thing to note is that Swiss Army Knives look way cooler at all times when every gadget it has is pointing out, so you have a multidirectional super pointy weapon of diverse tools for the all-around scout! This thing has like three knives, screw drivers, a toothpick, tweezers, and two things I have no idea about. Anyway, I shaped it so it looks like a stealth bomber. Nobody suspects the Swiss! Their country isn't really good for anything. They invented this knife and a type of cheese that stinks and their design for it had holes in it; clearly a sign of bad engineering. Too bad they couldn't invent better things. At least they have amazing ping-pong players there. Another thing, when you read the poetry written by a murderer right before they killed someone, it's really creepy. It gives me the shivers reading this bad poetry about suicide. Disturbing: like you're inside the head of a murderer. Hmm. It appears to be 1am already. Must get sleep.

Having a Bad Spelll

Today as I was leaving dinner, an employee said, "Have a nice day!" and my first thought was "why don't you make me, you son of a bitch!" But instead, I said, "you too," and promptly left. I don't know why my first thought is something mean and angry, but it is, and I'm not sure if it's funny that I think of these things, or sad. I went from wide awake and energetic at dinner to super tired. It was a wasted day I guess. I went to my classes and paid attention for the entire duration, minus the drawings of women, er...objects. I read articles from 3 to 6 or so and some were really quite interesting. One was http://theinternetcollege.com and it was about statistics and singles and stories about tactics and special forces. Well, there weren't any special forces, but it was interesting. One story went like this:
Since I had to be at work at 8:00, I went to the health club every weekday morning at 6:30. Well, this one morning when I got there, I found that they were tearing up the men's shower room because of a leak, so, with the help of some curtains, the women's locker room was made "coed" until they got it fixed. I never was very awake at that time, and I guess hadn't noticed this woman who worked out every morning at the same time, but I guess she had noticed me.
When I finished my workout, I grabbed my towel and rather hesitantly went into the women's locker room. The place seemed empty, but I heard a shower running. They had things sort of divided up with curtains. I undressed, wrapped the towel around me and headed toward the showers. Then this woman looked over the shower door — they had individual shower stalls with doors in the women's side — and looked around and saw the place was empty.
She then said, "The water's already hot in this one." I hesitated for a moment, but she opened the door for me. When I got inside, she handed me the soap and said, "How about doing my back." So I washed her back, and began to go for the whole monty. But when I tried this, she reached for her pepper spray she kept in her ass and got me good. Then she stabbed me with a big knife (in the heart).
Okay, maybe I made up the last two sentences to ruin the classy ending, but how could you tell? The story was pointing out that health clubs and spas were a good place to meet people. It's quite neat how easy it is to go from one link to the next without stopping. Anyways, I had nothing better to do and I once again couldn't even listen to music because Josh decides to sleep from 1pm-6pm, and like I said before, my headphones are nowhere to be found. I've yet to look inside my speakers and monitor, but I think everywhere else has been covered. Anyway, not 3 minutes after I got sick of reading and left to go talk in Nick's room, Josh wakes up and leaves without saying a word. He was just waiting for me to leave, squeezing out every last bit of fun I could have had listening to music, before deciding to get up. I know his plans. I bet he was like, "Oh it is evil, It is SO evil, It is a bad BAD plan,...that will hurt many people...that are GOOD. I think it is great, because it is so bad!" just like Betty. And I read a bunch of interesting blog stories. One guy was ranting about how he was hanging out with his band D7 and saying how it was from before D12 so it wasn't stolen. Does anyone know what D7 means? It better not just be something stupid like Dynasty 7, because that would just be dumb, and I don't know why anyone would think that was great. I was also made happy b/c same said blogger(ruvym.blogspot) was talking about playing Magic, and if there was ever a word that made me happy, it is magic. Is there really anything more magical than magic? I think not. Magic is magical, and that is why it is so great. Magicians are great (if they are good), and they don't even do real magic. What I don't understand is why comic book creators like Marvel and such didn't use the magic word to explain superhero powers. They would always say Spiderman, the Hulk, and Wolverine developed their special power through an extraordinary means that was explainable. I mean, wouldn't it be much cooler if Wolverine had "magical" claws of destructiony mahem, as opposed to a scientifically engineered material imposed in his skeletal structure? Or what if they explained Spiderman's ability to climb up walls and shoot near unlimited amounts of crazy silly string, that is both strong enough to stop a train, stretchy enough to launch himself like a sling shot, aerodynamic enough that it flies straight as hell, and light enough that he can carry superflous amounts of it with him, by saying it was magic. I don't know when this word became so unpopular, so uncool, but I'm here to reinstate it into the world of the cool. Because that's what I do. I lead the way for cool. Which is why I play Magic and Halo2 when I have time, because those things are not nerdy at all. Magic is what everything should be based on and the explanation for how everything runs. I want a magic-powered television and a magic-powered car--none of that gasoline/electric/solar/wind explanatory garble. So put down that science textbook and pick up a magic wand, because Harry Potter is a wonderful, magical guy.